Free Fall

Now I finally accept it
I have felt the upward winds
I have had my happiness

Now I must stop struggling
I need to stop flapping my wings in vain
For this wind can not carry me anymore

It's merely a matter of time
Before it gives in

There is nothing I can do
Nothing but fold up my wings for cover
And take the pain as it comes

I know it will hurt
It will hurt like hell

But it will also heal
Sooner or later

No matter how long it takes
No matter how many tears will be shed
No matter how dense the darkness will be

A new dawn
Will be waiting

Midsummer nights

I just had a great Midsummer / Midsummer's Eve with my friends! What did we do?... Well: "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas and when we play this is Vegas". We had fun at least! I think I was the only one that was awake the whole night (ok, I slept lightly on-and-off for about on hour between 8 and 9 in the morning and woke up everytime someone walked through the room), but oh dear heavens it was worth it! The place we were at was next to a lake so the view was amazing, but it was absolutely magical that morning. The lake was covered by mist so that the other side of the lake and the horizon completely disappeared, but you could still see the sun through it, later on the mist slowly started to clear up and it turned into a bright sunny day. As I already said, it felt magical standing there watching the sunrise while the morning dew in the grass soaked my feet, it was really quiet and a just a handful of the company was awake. I watched the mist disappear from in-doors though, but it was still nice. I really hope that I will be able to catch that magic in some story later on... I also decided to take a walk in the morning sun, which took a bit less than two hours and was really refreshing! It was so quiet, except for the bird song, and so peaceful... If it wasn't for those bloody mosquitos it would have been perfect.
I also created a new character for a roleplaying game called Elementalist. Her name is Dawn Cole and she is an ice-cold an-order-is-an-order-type of character and her element is metal. I played her Awakening yesterday and I can't help feeling sorry for the lass... It started with her calling to her parents and brother in order to find out if they had any "jobs" for her, no one answers... Not that odd really, but she went over just-in-case to check on them (her parents and brother were neighbours, for the record) since you never know in this buisness (Yes, she and her family are more or less crminials). When she arrives the place is sealed off by rescue workers and the house is badly burnt... Everything she finds out is that there was a gas leak, a fwoom (the sound gas makes when ignited) and they are still searching through the debris. So she goes to hospital to wait for news and that ended with her identifying her family's burnt bodies, that she noticed had some gunshot wounds. When she comes home she manages to rip of the handle from the door and breaks the lock, so she just leaves to calm down a bit. She went for a walk in Central Park and there some Mr. Bright Guy takes her for a child, tries to make a move on her and manages to piss her of, so she cuts him in the arm (just to make a clear statement, not really meaning to harm), something says swisch and he runs off.  About the rest that happened, let's just say that she had a bad day that just went worse and worse and some wierd things happened to her.

I have also started playing in my friends Ghost In The Shell campaign! My character's real name is Layla Tsukada, but she calls herself Chou, has a full body cybernetic prosthetic and a few other goodies too. She is a drifting dare devil, a pretty laid back personality that likes to do things her way and craves for blood if any sorry idiot touches her racing bike. She had a pretty bad start too: She comes to her gangs hide out, its burning and when she calls her little brother she finds out that the gang (in her opinion) screwed things up and this is how things ended. Luckily the new base acctually was better than the old, so no hard feelings. Next my character takes on a simple job, get package from point A to point B as quickly as possible, but when she gets to point B they say that half of the amount they want isn't there. 20 minutes to get to point A, get the rest and back again, right no problem!... Long story short: A guy tries to run away with the bag at point A, I drive past and miss with my kick, turn around so I can try to side-swipe him of his feet and fail with my die roll. Ouch for both me (17 HP; 16 DMG) and the bike, about 8'000 yen in repair costs for me and about 3'000 yen for the bike. IN-game yen is worth more than euro currently ever has been, so we are talking about big money. I acctually managed to get the bike fixed, since I intimidated the contact that gave me the job to pay half of the repairs, but my character is still a mess (its was a close call that her cybernetics didn't start to show)... So I guess the next session will start with me begging for money for repairs, but accidents happens...

A new toy for the creativity!

Dad just came home with a new camera (a Canon EOS 500D systemcamera)! Geez, I feel excited like a five-year-old on Christmas! I have been dreaming for ages to get a new one, since mine barely manages outside in bright daylight and taking pictures inside is impossible... But now I can start taking REAL pictures! I just need to get the hang of using the camera and then I'll give free reighns to my creativity (so, friends be careful. I might give you a call)! I got a serious creativity shock which I'll abuse as long as I can, so I might get a bit of a spurt on writing The City Never Sleeps also, but at the moment I'm too all-in on photography. I just have to wait for the right weather and then I'll start searching the town for places where I could get some interesting pictures! I already have a few ideas, so I really hope that I can start soon or I'll just pop of excitement!

The City Never Sleeps: Bright Night Adrenalin

Bright Night Adrenalin

  Gin sat down in the chair by the handrail. He wasn’t really tired, but this was the best place for checking everyone out and finding a prey for the night. He could feel the beat of the music in his very core and the smell of alcohol and sweat was intoxicating. The shady lights felt soothing where he sat, but beneath him he knew that the bright neon’s could almost hypnotize you if you didn’t keep your head clear.

  It didn’t take long for the handsome youth to spot a perfect lady from the scene below him. She was a natural red-head, about five foot eleven and a hundred and sixty-five pounds, out with her friends whom had dumped her for ten minutes ago and most likely had just had a nasty break-up. Gin was curious to find out more, find out the parts his experienced eyes could not see.

  - Let’s play then, Gin whispered to himself with a grin as he went down the stairs and towards the bar.

  He took another look at the prey before ordering two Bloody Marys. That should be a good start for the evening. The bartender gave him a sly grin as he paid up.

  - Jealous? Gin grinned back. I bet you ten bucks that I’m getting laid tonight while you’re working your ass off for a bit more than nothing.

  The bartender obviously felt sorry for his pride and agreed on the bet.

  Gin took the drinks and left for his little entertainer. She wasn’t hard to spot through the crowd, but for tactical reasons it was better to take a long way round. That would give his introduction an element of surprise. Walking around was also much easier and less painful for arms and ribs.

  - Would the lovely lady appreciate a drink? Gin said with a gentle smile. I could not help getting the impression that you are feeling lonely.

  The girl turned around calmly and scrutinized him from top to bottom before accepting the drink. She seemed a bit timid, but that had never been a hindrance. Not for him and not for long at least.

  - I haven’t seen you around here, Gin said and moved a little closer to the lady. Searching for a change?

  - You could say that, the lady said with a faint smile. I had it pretty rough before moving here, but this city seems nice.

  - It is once you get settled down, Gin said truthfully. Would you mind talking somewhere quieter? It’s so hard to learn to know someone when the music is this loud.

  The lady shook her head, she didn’t mind. Gin led her to one of the VIP rooms upstairs that he had access to for these kinds of occasions. They were a good resource, since his lifestyle demanded that he could get some peace and quiet for him and his company every now and then. This particular club had pretty large rooms upstairs and they were quite comfy, but then again they could never even compete with the more expensive ones in the better districts.

  - So where were we? Gin said as he closed the door after himself. I believe that there has been no proper introduction.

  Gin felt how a shiver ran down his spine. Something was off with the atmosphere. For a mere second he thought that he saw some writing hanging in the air around his beautiful company, but that would have been delusional. Gin just shrugged it off and went and sat next to his victim.

  - My name is, Gin started but was cut off by the lady crashing her lips on his.

  Convenient, Gin thought and kissed back with equal passion. Well, innocence is overrated anyways.

  Gin grabbed her flame red hair and lightly pulled in order to get her neck exposed. He gently kissed down her pale neck, stopping every now and then to give a soft spot a bit of extra attention, while unzipping her dress. She wasn’t late to follow his example and in no time at all was his shirt unbuttoned and thrown somewhere.

  - Just sit back and relax, she whispered in his ear, clearly out of breath.

  Gin couldn’t hold back a few moans as she kissed and nibbled his body, tracing ever downwards.

  Through his blurry ecstasy Gin could hear knocks on the door. First neither of them cared, but as the knocks grew louder they became more and more distracting.

  - You have got to be shitting me, Gin groaned. I’ll go and shoo them off, so we’ll get some peace and quiet here.

  He gave his little devil a light kiss and went for the door.

  - Who the hell do you think you are? Barging in like that in a private room is considered rude, you know, Gin said with a piercing tone as he opened it.

  Suddenly he fell silent. A silenced gun was pointed over his shoulder and he heard a shot being fired into the room and a hiss that followed it.

  A hiss? Gin turned his head and he felt how he went weak in the knees. On the floor did lay a dead red head, but hell no that thing was a woman or even human. Not anymore at least. Gin felt how shivers ran up and down his spine and his head was filled by an odd buzzing. As if this wasn’t enough he started hearing whispers that seemed to emerge from nowhere and writing started to float around the corpse on the floor.

  They are everywhere. They hunt you. They seduce you. They kill you. They have done and will do that forever. There is nothing you can do about it.

  That almost sounded like a challenge, Gin thought.

  - What the hell is that? And who the hell are you?

  - That is a vampire, the shooter said calmly. All you need to know about me is that I am a hunter. I am truly sorry if I rudely interrupted you, but I thought that your life just might be worth saving.

  - Well thanks then, I guess, Gin said steadily. Are there anymore of those out there?

  - More than you can imagine.

  For once Gin shut up in order to think clearly. He could have had an ecstatic night with a vampire, he had almost been killed by it, he had been saved by a stranger and had hallucinated some weird stuff, the hallucination had seemed like a challenge and he had never turned one down and would never do that either. Well, it could have been worse and he had been through stranger things.

  - How do I become a hunter? Gin said confidently to the dark man. I could really enjoy this kind of stuff.

  - Hunting is a dangerous business, the man said with a serious tone. You should think it over before you blurt out such big words. Would you mind helping me clean up here?

  Yes, Gin would mind. He sat down in a clean corner and watched the old man to the dirty work. Cleaning up messes he left behind had never quite been his thing and there were always people who could do it for him. It just took a bit of persuasion and the right amount of money.

  When the room once again was neat and clean, or close enough at least, the youth and the dark shooter sneaked out through the back door with the body. They hid the body of the thing deep down the alley. They really didn’t have to worry about someone finding it, since this particular block wasn’t exactly known for being safe at this hour. No one would lift a finger because of a strange woman’s corpse around here, since it was a pretty common sight.

  - So, you mind telling me about hunters and how to become one now? Gin said impatiently. I can always find out stuff on my own if you don’t.

  This seemed to wake some concern in the old man. He gave Gin a look that made him feel immensely uncomfortable. It felt like he was being examined to the very core of his soul.

  - My party is a man down at the moment, the man said with a sigh. But you should know that being a hunter isn’t an easy job that you can do just for fun.

  - Good! Then I’m the man you want, Gin said with a grin ignoring the last part of what the man said. I have always loved parties.

  The dark man couldn’t hold back a faint smile. The boy would be a pain to carry around, but he might actually be of use.

  - Faron Perez, the dark stranger said and held out a hand. Welcome aboard.

  - Gin Collins, the youth said and shook hands. Pleasure to meet you.

Break my chains

I have been sitting in my cage
For how long?
That, I do not know

I have been silently crying out
Hoping that someone will hear
That someone would break the chains

Of course no one heard
Whom can hear a cry without sound?
Not even a fool would believe in that

But it doesn't take much
A mere whisper is enough

Then someone will hear you
Then someone will hold you close
And listen

Pushing the limit of my comfort box

So, I'm going to attend the larp "Känslomagikern är far till alla barnen" (Free translation: The emotion magician is the father to all the children) in July and my character is... "a bit" out of my comfort zone. Her name is Lasidaari, she is a Life magician / Body magician and she is a courtesan/information gatherer. Lasidaari is also one BIG personality, so I'm a bit nervous how I'm going to pull her off... But I guess I'll be fine since I'm starting to get used to doing a bit over the top characters.
I've already planned more or less what I'll be wearing and all I can say about the outfit is that I am more likely to freeze to death than get a heatstroke and I'll save a lot of money on getting fabric (which - on the other hand - I'll lose on buying all kinds of chains, buttons and other bling-bling stuff. I'll also be wearing A LOT of jewelry and I'm still about 3 bracelets, 2 "bracers" (bracelets-to-wear-on-the-arm-thingies), a pair of earrings (I'll probably make a pair of my own) and a few longer necklaces short... and all in gold. Hopefully I'll find a place where I can get them for a low price since I don't want to spend fortunes on stuff this time (I bought a bit too expensive ones for Sandman)...
In the end the larp is most likely going to be nuts (in a good way) and I'll deffinetly have a whole lot of fun! I'll probably mess up a few characters on the way, but who cares about small details... ;)