1.3.12

A Midnight Confession

I watch the shining moon in the night sky
Its pale gleam lighting up the world
The stars dancing around its roundness
Smiling down at me

Its light shines through the treetops
Through the bright green leaves
Mirroring itself in the resting dew
Bringing back those summer memories

It carefully caresses the lakes smooth surface
Letting its shape waltz with the wind on the waves
Guarding the serene moment
Calming my dizzy mind

In the sky a lonesome creature flutters by
A bird with a plumage that sparkles with color
But is hidden by the shadows of the night
I feel its soul touch mine

I let my voice carry out my wish
Lend me the strength, the will and the courage
To let my dreams grow wings and shine
Let them be my beacon through the night

- - -

Just a little poem to remind that I do still write, I just publish a little less here... So if you want to keep a bit better trackof me: Follow me on deviantart or on my other blog!

2.12.11

Long time no typing...

Well, I'm just making a quick update on what's going on so that people don't believe I've quit... Not at all! I have continued on TCNS and made the decision to acctually write it as a novel.

I am also writing a new short story, just to get a break from all the "serious" writing. The short story will be called "The Messenger", at least for now. The story is about Parisa, an angelic messenger, whom works for ANXO. She is happy with her post, but believes that she would be of more help in some other part of the company, for example the Steel Wings. But she also knows that if somebody knew about her heritage she would get the sack, since she is a result of "an unholy union" between an angel and a demon. To others she might not seem different, but Ramiel, the CEO, knows about the powers that sleep within her. Powers that could be hazardous if not controlled and used properly.

4.9.11

TCNS: A Love Song


  A cloud of thick cigar smoke filled the club and a melancholic song mirrored the atmosphere. This was not a place for dance, love or laughter. This was one of the places people seemed to end up at when they felt miserable, alone and forgotten.
  Sheri watched the crowd from the stage and let them hear about her pain and suffering through her words and voice.
  There weren’t that many customers tonight expect the regulars. A few sat by the bar and some were scattered around the tables. The only thing they had in common was that everyone seemed gloomier than the other. Expect for one.
  He was wearing a dark grey suit and had a glass of red wine in his hand. He had been staring intensely at her for the whole night. It seemed like he actually was more interested in her performance than in reaching the bottom of his glass.
  The song was finished and as Sheri stood up a lone applaud originated from the man’s corner. Ignoring it, Sheri walked off the stage and went to her dressing room. As she closed the door behind her she let out a long sigh.
  She unzipped her blood red dress, let it slowly slide off and let her hair down. She really didn’t long for putting on her waitress uniform, so she took her time and an extra glance at herself in the mirror. Her appearance would be more fitting for a seductive siren than a simple waitress.
  A small yellow jar sat alone on the table. “For keeping you stable”, the shrink had said. If it wasn’t necessary for staying in working condition she would have thrown the pills in the gutter. She took a few and swallowed them before leaving the room.
  - You can go home now Alice, Sheri said with a faint smile. I’ll take over from here.
  - Thanks, the woman responded. A whisky to the man with the trench in table 5 and a new bottle of wine to the suit in the corner.
  - Got it.
  A young boy had sat down by the piano. He played as if bound by a beautiful, yet sorrowful spell. His smooth voice echoed through the hall as Sheri put down the whisky by the almost passed out man in a trench coat and picked up the empty ones. Silently she put them on a tray and brought them back to the bar. For a few seconds she then stopped to listen to the music before heading towards the corner with a bottle of wine.
  - The boy is good, but a little bit pitchy, the man said. Don’t you think?
  Sheri looked up at the man and noticed that he met her with an equally piercing gaze.
  - You seem to know something about music, Sheri said as she put down the bottle on the table.
  - I have picked up a few things over the years, the man said with a grin. Would you like to sit down for a minute? You fascinate me.
  For a second she hesitated. But a minute or two surely could do no harm, right? So she pulled out a chair and sat down by the table.
  - So, what do you find so fascinating in me? Sheri said looking straight into the man’s eyes.
  - The determination in your eyes, he answered calmly. I have never seen such power, but there is also something sad hanging in the air.
  - Interesting. So what brings a man like you to a place like this?
  The man pulled his chair a bit closer to hers, without breaking their eye contact.
  - The same as everyone else: A great loss. I just lost my lover in an odd accident. I found the body, drained from blood, in my bathtub. The world is so cruel and humans die so easily.
  - True, Sheri said impatiently.  Now you have to excuse me. I have work to do. Enjoy your wine.
  She stood up and went back to the bar. She was actually thankful for taking those pills, since they were the only thing keeping her together at the moment.

  The next night Sheri had another show and again she put on the mask of a seductive siren in order to sing about the pain everyone kept hidden in their hearts and the salvation people hoped to find at the bottom of a glass. And again the man sat in the corner, wearing another grey suit and drinking red wine.
  After the show Sheri changed her clothes and went to sit by the man in the corner. There was nothing else to do at the moment anyways.
  They chatted for a while about this and that without asking anything personal. They had a lot in common and if it would have been another time, place and circumstances they could really have hit it off. But Sheri could never let such a thing happen.
  - You have stain on your shirt, Sheri said. It looks like blood.
  The man tensed up and tried to cover the stain with his jacket.
  - It’s just some red wine, he said nervously. Oh my, how time flies! I’m sorry but I really need to leave now.
  - What a coincidence, Sheri said calmly with a piercing look. So do I.
  The man hurried out and after a few seconds Sheri followed him. When she got outside she just managed to get a glimpse of a grey jacket disappearing behind a corner. Soon after some clatter and a few curses were heard. Too bad, the clumsy ones weren’t much of a challenge for a skilled hunter.
  She followed the figure through dark alleys and backstreets. After a few blocks it stopped to look around for followers. It relaxed and walked calmly into the dead end. Sheri grinned to herself. Now the real fun could start.
  Careful not to make any sound she snuck after the thing and hid behind a dumpster. A man and a woman stood a few steps away from her, whispering. The man caressed the woman caringly before giving her a passionate kiss. New lovers obviously.
   Their relationship didn’t matter. The clock was ticking anyways and soon time and luck would run out.
  The woman, clearly the dominant one, pressed the man up against the wall and kissed his neck. The man seemed to fade into some odd kind of ecstasy mixed together with fear and pain. First tensing up and then passing out.
  The creature giggled and crouched over the poor fool. He hadn’t had a chance against that monster. But tonight the luck was on his side.
  Sheri pulled out a knife and stepped out of the shadows. The creature let out a surprised shriek and its eyes widened by fear. Quickly it pulled its act together and tried to figure out how to explain this.
  - Take it easy, it stuttered. This is not what it looks like.
  - Do you really think I’ fall for such a lie? Sheri said coldly. What I have seen and the blood on your jacket are more than enough proof of what you are. Aren’t they Alice?
  For a split second Sheri felt the high from the creature’s horror. Then she ended its petty life and covered the grey jacket in what must, a long time ago, have been Alice’s blood.

  Sheri sat on her stool and sung. Tonight there was a bit of a crowd, but that didn’t keep her from seeing the man in a suit in the corner table. But tonight he wasn’t alone. Tonight he sat with a handsome young man as his company.
  After her number Sheri went to make them company for a while before her shift would start. The new one seemed quite naïve and cheery, but still he was both dignified and intelligent.
  - Michael would you mind getting us something to drink? The suit said caringly. I’m parched.
  - You’re such a pain, the youngster said and gave his company a light kiss. I’ll be right back with you two.
  Michael left and the suit leaned a bit closer to me.
  - Could you promise not to tell him about me drinking wine? He said nervously. He hates alcohol above all else and I don’t want to upset him.
  - Don’t worry, Sheri said with a smile. I’m used to keeping secrets.

2.9.11

Diasratensir update

For the record: I AM prioritize my other projects (since they "are in more of a hurry")... I have got two major news about it:

1. The world is created by Power and Energy, where Energy is what builds everything and Power gives life to it. To create a stable life-form there has to be a certain amount of both, but when acctually living either one can be more dominant (e.g. a stone has more Energy than Power in itself and a fairy almost no Energy in itself). There is constant amount of both Energy and Power, but the forms

2. There are people who live in the mountains (No geography, so atm still random, isolated mountains). The richer/higher up in the social rank you are the higher up and deeper in the mountain you live (with the ruler living the whole top part). But that's not what's so special about them. The special thing is that after the children are born Power starts to separate from their body and builds a "Soul Shadow". The shadow is more or less the persons true self and walks beside them for the rest of their life. A person can only see their own shadow, but the shadows can see each other just like we see other people (in some cases twins and persons who are truly and whole heartedly in love with each other can see each others Shadows). Shadows have their own rules and customs, of which one is not to tell about other peoples Shadows without their permission.

21.8.11

Fal'narn update 1.0

I thought that I probably should make a quick update on the Fal'narn project, since it is on the top of my priority list at the moment.
I have managed to get a good start on it, since I already have an idea about how the people is and a few things here and there about the details. I have also managed to more or less finish everything about magic/magicians in the country! I will stay hush-hush about the details, but I can tell that in this country magicians are exeptionally unpopular (if the parents notice that their new born child has magic powers they get rid of it without remorse, e.g.)... I have also started planning the clothing style and it will be a concoction consisting: Fantasy/Medieval clothing style, Elegant Gothic Aristocrat style and Kimono style.
Pictures that could be used for inspiration (sorry for bad picture quality):
Medieval/Fantasy
EGA
Kimono

13.8.11

A Small Sanctuary

  I looked over to the lake and noticed a shadowy figure sitting there, all alone. I knew about that shadows pain and I just wanted to walk down the dew wet lawn and sit down next to that figure and say:
  "You don't have to talk to me or even acknowledge that I am here next to you, if you don't want to. But I will sit down here and be available, no matter what you want, since I just can't stand around, do nothing and feel useless. Got it?"
  But something kept me from doing it. I don't know if it was selfishness or kindness. But I do sincerely regret that I merely walked off that night.
  I haven't felt your pain. But I do think that I might have a slight clue about how it must feel. And in that case I really want to make the world seem at least a little bit better.

  Telling you "It's going to be alright" would feel like hypocrisy
  Telling you "I know how you feel" would pretty much be lying
  But I want to ease your pain
  I don't need to be your guardian angel
  I don't need to be a saviour

  All I want is
  To be someone you know will care about you
  To be someone you know you can always talk to
  To be someone you know you can always trust
  To be someone you know will always help you pick yourself up when you fall
  
  
  I am not a hero
  I am not an angel
  I don't need to be someone like that
  But I want to be a small sanctuary
  That never goes away

4.8.11

Ah! Home sweet home!

So now I'm finally home from Stockholm! The vacation was really great and oh dear heavens I have spent a lot of money! I really hope that I've got my salary for the acting job so I can pay my parents back... They agreed on paying for me during the trip, because I hadn't got any (yet) as long as I pay them back when I get the money. Now I just have to count how much I have acctually spent and run that amount through a currency converter (Swedish Kronor -> Euro)...

Now it's time to sum up what we acctually did during the week:
  It started off by driving down to Turku (for me from Vaasa) and taking the night boat to Stockholm. When we arrived we didn't do much, just spent the morning at our relatives whoms house we lived in during the week (they went on a trip too, so we had the whole house for ourselves) and Mom and Dad went to check on a boat (found on the internet) which they wanted to buy, but it seems like they hadn't been clear enough with that since the owner sold the boat to someone else (someone from Turku to add insult to injury!) later that week... Well, such things happen. When they came back we went shopping in Stockholm Outlet, an area where a lot of designers have small shops with clothes for outlet (a.k.a. lower) prices. I didn't buy anything from there, but found a lovely pair of leather boots from a shop outside of the Outlet (which I bought later on from a shop at Kista Gallerian, but more about that later). We also took a quick tour through IKEA and Stadium, but we knew that we would come back later so we didn't buy anything.
  The next day we spent slacking, but we also did a trip to XXL where I bought a sleeping bag, since I'm really tired of carrying around the huge and clumsy ones we have... But this one is small and handy!
  On Wednesday we started the serious buisness and went shopping at Drottninggatan in Stockholm. I don't know what was wrong with me, since I was pretty much the only one to buy anything that day (my Mum and sis are great shoppers and they found nothing)! I have already lost track of what I bought when, but there will be a list of the things I bought at the end of this post so don't worry.
  On Thursday we thought that we would take a pause from shopping and went to Junibacken! Yes, the place is meant for little kids... But the whole place is so adorable me (18) and my sis (15) just can't resist going there! The irony s also that the first thing we said when the idea of going to Stockholm was mentioned that we instantly demanded that we should go there... It's pretty much the same thing everytime we go there (We have been to Junibacken on every Stockholm trip), but it's still as fun as it was when we were kids. They also have a great bookstore and I bought two books there. We had planned to go to Vasa Museet that day, but we realised that we wouldn't have enough time, so we went to Gamla Stan instead. There is a great bookstore in Gamla Stan (for geeks at least) called Science Fiction Bokhandeln which I truly and whole heartedly recommend! I had to be really careful not to start looking to closely at every shelf, since the rest of my family would hardly have appreciated waiting for hours outside one shop, but I acctually bought a card game from there ("Are you the traitor?"), but I haen't been able to test it yet because it takes 4 players and none in my family wanted to try it... But all in due time!
  On Friday we went shopping again, but as I said I have lost track of what was bought when and where...
  On Saturday we had meant to go to Vasa Museet, but "someone" (me) woke up really late and took time to get ready so we went to Kista Gallerian instead! The place was HUGE (we realised it better afterwards, when we realised that there had been a sign that said "MAX 250m ->" in one end of the mall and MAX had been in the middle of the place...), but we didn't spend that much time there.
  On Sunday we finally went to Vasa Museet! The place wasn't that crowded as one would have thought that day and it was really interesting see the old shipwreck of Vasa. There was a whole lot of history and interesting facts about the people and stuff, but somehow I didn't feel like reading much (Which I regret a bit now...)
  On Monday we bought a few things we had left and spent the last of our kronor. The rest of the day we spent packing (which went amazingly painlessly) and with our relatives.

Complete list of what I bought during the trip:
- 3 games:
  - Stolen (PS2, used, 29 Kr)
  - Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow (PS2, used, 79 Kr)
  - Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater (PS2, used, 119 Kr)
- A PS2 controller (Brand: Gametech, 99 Kr)
- A card game: Are you the traitor? (from: Science Fiction Bokhandeln, 148 Kr)
- 3 books (Firstname Lastname: Title):
  - Patrick Rothfuss: The Name of the Wind (139 Kr)
  - Sofia Nordin: Natthimmel (65 Kr)
  - Cornelia Funke: Reckless (199 Kr)
- A Retro Heat Change Mug (from: Lagerhaus, 99 Kr)
- A fancy peach colored top with a black belt (Brand: Amisu, 179 Kr)
- A blue-green-ish T-shirt with the text: My heart needs music (Brand: Fishbone, 49 Kr)
- A bright green T-shirt with a cute, black turtle with geeky glasses and the text: Turtlelly Nerdy (Brand: Fishbone, 49 Kr)
- A brown T-shitr with beige butterflies and some text (H&M, 99 Kr)
- A black top with an ornate silver mirror and the text: ...Who is the fairest of them all (H&M, 99 Kr)
- A Black Cardigan (H&M, 149 Kr)
- A pair of black sweatpants (Brand: Puma, 299 Kr)
- A pair of dark blue, tight jeans (Brand: Divided, 199 Kr)
- 3 bras (yes, these are worth mentioning):
  - dark blue, silk (Brand: Censored, 79 Kr)
  - light blue / blue / white (Brand: Censored, 139 Kr)
  - "military green, drummer boy- styled" (Brand: Censored, 169 Kr)
- A pair of black, leather boots (499 Kr)
- Sleeping bag (Brand: Haglöfs, 399 Kr)
- Tea and sweets (unknown price)